Today has been a hard day, actually scrap that. This evening has been a hard… evening??
I am more drained than I could explain, I feel sick to my stomach and on top of that I’ve had a very sad, unhappy crying baby on my hands.
Elsie has suffered with Silent Reflux from a few weeks old, which doctors firstly didn’t want to say it was Silent Reflux. I knew she wasn’t right and the only thing I knew at the time was colic, but I knew she didn’t have the symptoms. While reading another Mummy Blog one morning I found all the symptoms of silent reflux and had one of them EUREKA! Moments. I had finally found something that was relatable.
She would only settle on her belly, or with her head propped up, she HATED being flat on her back. The only place in the end that she would settle was on me, this on its own was draining. Don’t get me wrong I loved the cuddles. But when you have a sh*t tip of a house to sort and a screaming baby who only stops while laying on you, well. It’s difficult to say the least. You could hear her having difficulty swallowing milk and it hitting her stomach very quickly. Then a few minutes later it would come back up as far as her throat to the point she’d choke on it then take it back down and cry. When I say cry it isn’t like her cry for attention, she was genuinely in pain. Seeing her like it broke my heart.
If you don’t know already Reflux is when your baby brings all the milk/acid back up to the point of vommiting. Silent Reflux is when they try to bring it up but it gets stuck in the throats which causes real discomfort and irritation.
Once I found the blog I told my mother about it who said. Don’t be stupid she’s fine there’s nothing wrong with her. She didn’t see her everyday as I did, until one night it got too much and I rang her to come up. She got to see Elsie for herself having one of her episodes a few minutes after feeding. She was screaming the house down, choking and in pain, a lot of it.
We took her to A&E that night because I was so worried. They were useless as per usual. They said this is accident and emergency we can’t do anything you need to see a GP. Bearing in mind my daughter was choking every feed and it was a Saturday night so we wouldn’t be able to see our GP until Monday.
The GP didn’t even look her over, he said it probably wasn’t silent reflux it was colic. I went on about how I KNOW it was silent reflux and that she needs something to help her, she can’t go on like this. So he prescribed her baby gaviscon which made her feed thicker so she couldn’t bring it up. Which was doing the trick, until it made her constipated until she cried her little heart out. It was so hard you could literally pick it up and play Bowling with it and probably get a Strike.
So we tried her without it. Even with just one bottle without the gaviscon we were back to the beginning again. Crying, choking. It just wasn’t nice to see our little girl go through it.
So I took her back to the doctors Monday. I told the doctor everything AGAIN that has been happening with her. So he finally said “she probably has a bit of silent reflux”….
it’s like only when you keep on that they then listen. It’s so frustrating. But he has now prescribed Ranitidine.
I’ve read up on it that it does get worse before it gets better. But boy I hope it hurries up. I am literally so drained and hearing my baby scream in pain makes it no better.
Motherhood isn’t a walk in the park on most days, but it’s things like this that make it 10 times harder.
So I am begging. To any old or new time mothers who already have experiences with Silent Reflux to email/DM me with more information and some tricks and tips to help my little one.
I can’t have her in pain like this anymore, and I sure as hell can’t allow myself to feel this drained with it.
-MLS and Me.